Why were ancient Egyptian
Why were ancient Egyptian children confused? Because their daddies were mummies.
Little
Little Mary was not the best student in Sunday School. Usually she slept through the class. One day the teacher called on her while she was napping, “Tell me, Mary, who created the universe?” When Mary didn’t stir, little Johnny, an altruistic boy seated in the chair behind her, took a pin and jabbed her [...]
After my wife and her former best
After my wife and her former best buddy, another Air Force wife, were separated by a move that posted one husband on the opposite coast, the telephone became their chief means of communication. When our phone bills showed astronomical increases, the other spouse and I sought relief. Since we both owned computers, we encourage our [...]
YOUR SO BALD THAT WHEN YOU WHERE
YOUR SO BALD THAT WHEN YOU WHERE A TURTLENECK YOU LOOK LIKE A ROLL ON DEODORANT.
A Texan walks into a pub in
A Texan walks into a pub in Ireland and clears his voice to the crowd of drinkers. He says, “I hear you Irish are a bunch of hard drinkers. I’ll give $500 American dollars to anybody in here who can drink 10 pints of Guinness back-to-back.” The room is quiet and no one takes up [...]
What did the egg say to the
What did the egg say to the boiling water? “How can you expect me to get hard so fast? I just got laid a minute ago.”
Do you know what a mice said when
Do you know what a mice said when it saw a bat? Mom ! I see an angel.
“Will I ever be able to race my
“Will I ever be able to race my horse again” the owner asked the vet. The vet replied, “You certainly will, and you’ll probably beat her too!”
Why do you need a driver’s
Why do you need a driver’s licence to buy liquor when you can’t drink and drive?
The desk
The desk sergeant answered the phone, and at once a woman began screaming. “You’ve got to help me! There’s a giant gray thing in my yard, and it’s pulling apples off the tree with its tail!” “What’s he doing with the apples?” the sergeant asked. “If I told you,” the woman cried, “you wouldn’t believe [...]
