A man telephoned an airline office in New
A man telephoned an airline office in New York and asked, “How long does it take to fly to Boston?” The clerk said, “Just a minute…” “Thank you,” the man said and hung up.
How many pilots does it take to change a
How many pilots does it take to change a light bulb? None, it is done by the automatic pilot.
A young guy in a
A young guy in a two-engine fighter was flying escort for a B-52 and generally being a nuisance, acting like a hotdog, flying rolls around the lumbering old bomber. The hotdog said over the air, “Anything you can do, I can do better.” The veteran bomber pilot answered, “Try this hot-shot.” The B-52 continued its [...]
A husband suspects his wife is having an
A husband suspects his wife is having an affair with a pilot, but she keeps denying it–until finally the husband just knew when his wife said: “Honey, I’ve told you once, I’ve told you twice, I’ve told you niner thousand times, negative on the affair …”
A mother and her son were
A mother and her son were flying “Southwest Airlines” from Kansas to Chicago. The son (who had been looking out the window) turned to his mother and said, “If big dogs have baby dogs and big cats have baby cats, why don’t big planes have baby planes?” The mother (who couldn’t think of an answer) [...]
USAir recently introduced a special
USAir recently introduced a special half fare for wives who accompanied their husbands on business trips. Expecting valuable testimonials, the PR department sent out letters to all the wives of businessmen who had used the special rates, asking how they enjoyed their trip. Letters are still pouring in asking, “What trip?”
Once as Laloo was coming out of airport,
Once as Laloo was coming out of airport, there was huge rush and the security guard told him, “Wait Please.” To which Laloo replied, “65 kgs,” and moved on.
Michael Jackson, Bill Clinton and Nelson
Michael Jackson, Bill Clinton and Nelson Mandela are in an airplane with 20 kids. The airplane gets a failure and is doomed to crash. The plane has only 20 parachutes. Nelson Mandela, as a great humanitarian says that children should have them. Bill Clinton gets panicky and shouts, “SCREW THE CHILDREN!!” Michael Jackson’s face lights [...]
I have a friend who is a pilot on a
I have a friend who is a pilot on a 747. I said “Hi Jack.” He shot me.
It was mealtime on a small airline and the
It was mealtime on a small airline and the flight attendant asked the passenger if he would like dinner. “What are my choices?” he asked. “Yes or No,” she replied.
